i'm going bonkers soon..

maintaining sanity is so damn hard..

i try and try, but i just can't seem to be reaching my destination..

perhaps i hadn't tried hard enough.. perhaps i din really try at all..

i want it! i really really want it.. my heart really yearns for it.. but how can i get it when my heart wants and my body and soul doesn't cooperate..

i need help.. i don't know how to get help.. when i want to get help, i don't know what to ask..

i'm really being mental.. venting stress on others..

its bad of me to do that.. making unnecessary trouble for other people..

i'm afraid that i'll get so used to having u till one day i don't remember how to act on my own, how to be myself, how to learn not to depend on others so much..

i'm afraid of loneliness.. i need my friends to be with me.. i need them more than anything else..

i want them to be there for me when i need them and i want to be there for them when they need me..

it's been rough.. rough for me and everything else.. the stress level has gone up so high and i don't see any inch of myself moving to cope with the stress, just let everything else slide..

somebody please push me.. i need to wake up..

throw me into the cold freezing water..

make me shiver till i finally get up on my feet, leave the waters to a far more warm place..

i feel emotional..

i have to get up, find back my passion, and continue running this race..

and continue r.u.n.n.i.n.g